Doing what I'm supposed to do.

For as long as I can remember I have always done exactly what I'm supposed to do. I was in every club in high school. I was a cheerleader. I played tennis. I graduated with honors. In college, same story. I was in clubs. I was on student government. I went to therapy and worked hard to get past all my issues. Just what I was supposed to do. Once again, I graduated with honors. Then I got a job in my field. Just like I was supposed to. Now, I'm in the middle of applying for graduate school after taking that year off. Just like I was supposed to. My parents brag about me to all of their friends, "Look at my daughter, isn't she just perfect" and of course their friends are envious because their children lack "focus" and "goals". I love school. I don't think I will ever belong anywhere as well as I belong in the realm of academia. That is where I thrive. Ever since I graduated though, and here's where the BUT comes in, I've had this nagging urge to do something crazy, out of character, unexpected. I was talking to Bridget about this last week and she asked what I wanted to do and the first thing that came to mind was travel. Then, I was watching One Tree Hill last night, and I know this is a weird place to come up with inspiration, but Lucas was adapting his novel into a screenplay and I remembered that ever since I was a little girl I have always wanted to write a novel. There is something else I have always wanted to do but it always seemed a little far fetched, I have always wanted to learn Greek. I know it's not very practical to know Greek. But you remember that saying, "It's all greek to me."? I always wanted to be able to say, "Greek makes sense to me." Then I was talking to Bethany last weekend and she gave me some advice that I was very willing to accept. She said that you find pieces of yourself in different places, so go find them. I think my biggest issue right now is that I don't want to look back at my life and regret the things I didn't do. So, I need all of your help to be more spontaneous and to not hold back because I feel self-conscious. Thanks in advance. Ha ha.